Laos Day 3 – 4: The Forgotten World

Day 3 – 6th December 2007

Of the four South-east Asian mainland countries that I have visited and travelled through, there’s a wide array of adjectives that can be accorded to them. Cambodia can be described as depressing, Vietnam as thrilling, Thailand as hectic, but there’s a single word that can describe Laos in its entirety – it’s forgotten.

Whatever words I use to describe this surreal 3rd world country cannot triumph the experience of being there yourself. When you’re in Laos, you’re thrown back hundreds or thousands of years back in time in any particular country when technology is non-existent, and nothing but acres of trees and mountains dominate your view. And everything is done at a much slower pace, because you’re meant to take a chill pill, and enjoy and immerse yourself with the true meaning of relaxation.

There was a joke regarding the name Lao PDR (People’s Democratic Republic), the country’s official name. Whenever a foreigner appears to be impatient at the slow services he or she is receiving, others would inform the foreigner: Lao, Please Don’t Rush.

Anyway the next day, I woke up to aching shoulders and arms, caused by yesterday’s strenuous kayaking – strenuous by my almost non-existent exercising standards. I lazed in bed revelling in the cold, and later got up miserably to the restaurant opposite our guesthouse for breakfast.

Waking up to the beautiful sight of mountains.

Me in my just-woke-up hair (seriously, just look at the town with the damn mountains as if surrounding it).

On completing our orders, a fly or a bee buzzed and landed on the shoulder-sleeve of my jacket, and I lazily shooed it away. When I looked down on my sleeve, I was appalled to find yellow cluttered tiny dots on it – could be pollen, or insect dung, although I prefer to believe in the former. I bent down to smell it and a nasty pungent waft assaulted my nose and it was later that I had to spend a few minutes in our cramped toilet scrubbing the affected area of my jacket with soap.

Also took a long hot shower and I felt instantly refreshed. Nothing felt better than dousing my body with water at the right warmth coursing through the surface of my skin – it was gratifying, amazingly sensual even, and it resurrected my soul. A hot shower was all I needed to uplift me.

This is the infamous ‘Friends’ phenomenon of Vang Vieng. Look at all the foreigners lying down watching Friends reruns mindlessly – there are also other restaurants that have the similar sitting set-up, and you can even request what to watch from a selection of DVDs that they have.

It’s strange how escapism takes its form. For me, there I was in a relatively cooling guesthouse, listening to the chirpings of the birds, the cackling of roosters, far-off Laotian classic music from some shops’ speakers, Siew’s sudden gaffaws in the same room from watching How I Met Your Mother on his iPod, and soft incoherent sounds of comedic dialogues emanating from his iPod’s earphones possibly set on high volumes. There I was, in an escapist’s best dream come true. There I was, reading Life of Pi snuggling against my blanket as it was a little chilly, in a room with nary other sounds (other than the aforementioned ones) as we didn’t need to turn on the fan. There I was in Vang Vieng, in the middle of Laos, possibly in the middle of nowhere in the world.

Siew and I relaxing in the Friendship Restaurant when we stopped by there for lunch, as recommended by our kayaking tour guide yesterday as it was his sister-in-law’s shop. I fucking love these seats, it should be revolutionised as such throughout the world.

Laap, the country’s national dish. Basically ‘meat salad’ will be an appropriate way to describe it, and it’s quite good (minus the cili padi they dash on it).

Siew’s mee thingy. And they have fruit shakes as well everywhere here which are so damn good – wonder why in Malaysia it wasn’t as popular.

Looking outside the window of our guesthouse’s room, one would be greeted by the sight of laundry hanging in the backyard by 10 feet high stone walls and several uncompleted beams, the zinc roofs of shabby wooden houses (and two cats – one black, one white – just placidly crossing said zinc roofs); a little ahead were the coconut trees, and further still (yet closer to this town) were the silhouettes of mountains shrouded in intangible knots of clouds.

What is Laos? This is.

Me reading Life of Pi in said restaurant.

Duo photo assisted by self-timer.

We spent the entire day doing absolutely nothing productive. And that in itself was fun – relaxing. There was no need to worry oneself of assignments, exams, and deadlines; no news of Bersih or Hindraf or other political/racial/religious-motivated rallies reaching my eyes and ears; less thoughts given upon a global impending doom that is global warming (though the Frenchman that we met yesterday in the pickup truck asked us about it in his thick French accent, “How is global warming affecting Malaysia?” wtf); and in Laos, there is solace. There is peace. There are pristine local communities albeit slightly populated by foreigners.

I was surprised I found fun and relaxation in doing precisely nothing save for reading a book and enjoying the cooling, calming air, which maybe some of you may find hard to do – finding a need to fill each day with activities after activities.

Welcome to Vang Vieng, noted in a brochure as the ‘chill-out’ town of Laos.

Day 4 – 7th December 2007

What I thought would be a simple biking and caving journey turned out to be very long and trying indeed.

We woke up at 8am (WITHOUT alarm, a considerable feat, but then again I slept at 10pm yesterday), then we went for breakfast at Friendship – we seem to be going there daily as the food and drinks were remarkably cheap compared to other restaurants around, although it doesn’t have televisions. My banana pancake with honey was an absolute delight at 15000kip – slightly expensive if you convert it to RM (about RM5), but that’s what I try not to do.

We set out renting our bikes – the auntie ones mind you, with baskets galore, no gears, and definitely no suspension – for only 10000kip (~USD$1), and we got a free map in return (the proper mountain bikes were 30000kip). We left at probably around 9.30am, and went on our epic caving and cycling adventure.

The local kids can be seen playing everyday on the fields, as if they don’t actually study anything proper.

The guys play football, while the girls play skipping rope.

Foreigners are charged extra to cross this bridge wtf.

Some old missile/rocket thingy.

Cycling through vast lands of dead paddy.

Cows and goats can be seen grazing there.

Short clip of cycling through dead paddy and cow manure.

We decided to visit this particular cave called the Papoak Cave, and there, as sadly what almost the entire Laos is based on, was a hut collecting entrance fees.

Fine, we paid 10000kip each, walked a bit, stumbled onto another guy who offered to show us the cave. I wore his battery-powered flashlight around my arm (an actual heavy battery used in cars mind you) and went in. Less than 5 minutes later we walked out again, feeling less than impressed as the cave was incredibly small.

The cave guide later demanded payment and we were like “wtf”. In the end, because I severely dislike conflicts especially when I’m not within the safe sanctuary of my home, I decided to pay him but only for my part as I did use his torchlight (20000kip, more expensive than the entrance fee zz). The incredulous part was the guide spoke no English except the mispronounced 20000kip which sounded like 70000kip wtf.

Great view while climbing up to the cave.

Yes, the climb up to the cave was treacherous. It was steep and high, but nothing compared to the next cave we went.

Moving on, we went on cycling further, and interestingly as we passed by an incredibly rocky unpaved road, 2 small girls who were on their way home from school actually lifted their hands out and stopped us for a ride. We obliged, because the sun was blaring and unrelenting, and we kinda took pity on them. Later on the girls got off and I had to carry 2 young boys behind on my bike wtf I’m not that heavy enough to carry such a load ok. I was trying hard to maintain my balance and to NOT crash considering how bumpy the rocky path was.

A shot of the two girls (on the left) whom we carried each.

Another of my favourite pic, a boy hitching behind Siew’s bike.

Me and the boy looked awkward wtf.

It was an interesting experience – definitely one of the highlights of that day. And to think that these kids had to walk kilometres and kilometres to and fro from school to home daily. And to think back in Malaysia we’d complain about taking public transport to college.

Panorama pic – click on it to enlarge.

As we went on ahead after the kids reached their small wooden homes, a fair Korean guy on a motorbike coming from the opposite direction stopped me and we both looked at each other, somewhat awkwardly. “Korean?” he asked while pointing at me.

“No, Malaysian” I replied while adopting a Japanese I-speak-bad-English accent wtf I don’t know why I did that. To ensure no further awkward pauses ensue, I added “Annyonghaseyo” for good measure – the only Korean word I know.

“Oh!” he exclaimed with a laugh while showing a thumbs up sign. I returned the laugh, and we both went our separate ways from our brief encounter.

Siew and I eventually reached Pou Kham Cave (again after paying entrance fees) and went for its cave. The cave was 100m high sitting atop various sharp, steep jagged rocks which were very well dangerous for me (I even managed to cut my legs here and there), for a single wrong slip and you’d fall down and badly hurt yourself. Or die. I exaggerate not.

After muttering things like “Remind me why I’m doing this again?”, we reached the entrance of the cave. Finally. And went in.

Ugly picture because I don’t have an actual dSLR to display it as my eyes see it, but sunlight was streaming into the cave elegantly. There’s also a Buddha statue in it.

The cave’s bowels were hugeeee. I had never been to a massive cave in my life, and on setting foot there, you’d immediately notice that it was deathly quiet. We walked around for a bit and were joined by 2 British guys, and later an Asian girl and her tour guide came along. We sorta tagged along since the cave was of gargantuan proportions and there were probably many ways to reach the end.

There were a few extremely dangerous points in the cave, which began to look like a survival horror videogame (or even that B-grade movie flick The Descent) because one wrong slip on a slippery incline and you’ll fall helplessly metres and metres into the abyss – and the last place I’d like to die in is definitely not in a cave with a broken back wtf. You couldn’t even see how deep it was as the cave was.. erm, pitch-black dark.

Me looking hideous with the battery-powered flashlight.

Suffice to say I sustained minor cuts while climbing up to the cave and while exploring the cave itself. Wasn’t that exciting, but it was a fun experience indeed – what with the prospects of slipping and falling down to the deep depths of the cave continuously haunting me.

Later on, a few Italians who were in the cave wanted to borrow our torchlights which we gave them, and we waited at the entrance for the safe return (of the torchlights, not the people). Siew and I chatted then with the tour guide and the Asian woman, whom we found out was Singaporean. Later on another Korean girl joined our banter when she overheard our conversation, mentioning about the horrors of the slow boat ride from Huay Xai to Luang Prabang.

We wanted to dunk in a bit into the brilliant blue of the lagoon but didn’t have a chance. Jazz the Singaporean and her friend Li Ting (who didn’t want to climb up into the cave) were already leaving, and they invited us to join their expedition back to Vang Vieng by cycling. We agreed.

Jazz in the centre of the pic, Li Ting on the left side.

The tour guide, with cows walking ahead.

So we set off for our cycling ride, taking a different way back to Vang Vieng. I was a little apprehensive about joining them for the tour back to Vang Vieng because I thought they’re professionals when it comes to cycling, and I lack the stamina to keep up. Turns out that Li Ting cycled even slower than I did which was a huge relief, so I didn’t actually have to exert that much effort to keep up.

It was a pleasant stroll down the ‘back’ roads which were all not tarred, especially when we were taking our sweet time to paddle down the streets.

Crossing a river on a makeshift bridge. We gladly washed our faces with the water.

Of course, after a while with the unforgiving sun and our strength diminishing bit by bit, what was supposed to be a pleasant stroll through the outskirts of Vang Vieng started to turn into a chore. It was 2.30pm and I had yet to sink my teeth into anything.

We eventually stopped by at a shop/stall that we spotted for a break, but other than drinks, they sell nothing else so we went on. The girls already had their lunch and Siew and I hadn’t eaten any, but I told Siew, “Never mind, I don’t feel famished now anyway.”

Boy, did I regret those words later.

Awfully beautiful mountains with sunshine emanating from behind.

We met lots of kids on the way who were more than eager to scream “Sabaidee!” (Hello/Greetings) in which we replied the same. Despite that being the only Lao word that we know, their smiles and ours were more universal than any words can portray.

Black pigs roaming freely.

The first hour of cycling went fine, and after crossing the thresholds of the first hour I began to feel tired. We did have to wait for Li Ting a few times as she was a bit slow (not that I’m complaining), and I took every chance I had when she slowed down to take a breather.

After passing by what could be the 100th kid waving “Sabaidee” to us, I eventually found it less entertaining and awe-inspiring but I still maintained a cheerful (albeit exhausted) exterior.

Me cycling woot.

Resting is crucial.

Long story short, we eventually made it out to the main road after passing by tons of wooden houses, a college, zillions of trees and scenic mountains, extremely large satellite dishes that were either collecting dusts or rusts, and brownish roads. By then my energy level was at its lowest, and it hit a point when my entire body felt cold that I thought I was getting into fits.

The rest continued to cycle on, and you’ve never known what fatigue really is until you had a miserable breakfast of banana pancake with honey, skipped lunch, drank very little gulps of water, and continue to cycle even though you have next to no energy left. In the end, it was as if I was merely lamely moving my legs just to get the bicycle moving 0.5kmph even though my legs felt like disintegrating already.

We eventually reached the town, which at that point felt like eternity. Hallelujah, praise be to the gods. I was so hungry I bought a packet pf peanut butter biscuits for 5000kip, rushed back home, and tore it out savagely like a properly famished African child. I’ve never known pure hunger till then.

After a nice long hot shower, we met up with Jazz and Li Teng at our usual Friendship Restaurant for dinner. There we talked so many things about our travelling experiences (we clicked pretty fast, possibly because of our nationalities and our similarities), and it kinda was a huge relief to be able to speak normal Manglish with them (or Singlish in their case), and not having to unconsciously adopt an accent. Even so, they praised Siew and me for our “very good English” lol.

They told us about their experiences, such as how they were nearly bombed in a particular New Year’s Eve in Bangkok, or their thoughts about Vientiane, or how incredibly awful public toilets in Kunming, China were.. etc. It was like a mamak session with travellers that we were most comfortable with, except that instead of teh tarik there were fruit shakes.

We chatted about 2 hours till 8.30pm, got their e-mail address (they both apparently share one wtf), and we bade them goodbye. They were heading to Luang Prabang the next day.

The four of us at Friendship (yeah acquaintanceship was kindled that day).

Li Teng, Jazz (the more adventurous of the two), Siew, and me.

And we, we retire ourselves to our room, lepak for a bit, and finally succumbed to the dream world at 10+.