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Went out on Monday night at about 8.45pm to Pan Bakery SS15 with Andy to meet up with Kai Tzin and Esther, and later we were joined by Ding. I already had a mental list of what I should be doing each day (at every hour wtf) right up to my mid-sem tests next week, but looks like that imaginary list wasn’t meant to be – in the past two days, I’ve done nothing of that sort (all dreary studies-related), which should’ve been obvious as I’m not known to follow timetables or schedules.

I decided that lepaking with my friends takes priority over studying, and there I was, partly working on both my Business Stats and Chinese homework, partly watching HBO’s Stay Alive being screened on the telly, partly chatting with the rest. In the end we went back at 11pm+.

Yesterday at about 2.50pm, Ding (along with Kai Tzin) picked me up and Andy, and off we went to Pyramid to watch the Chinese war movie Assembly that was reportedly good. It was a decent watch – I particularly enjoyed listening to the Mainland Chinese accents that differ very much than our local Mandarin wtf – punctuated with moments of hilarity when you have ridiculous Malay subtitles done by an obviously poor translator.

Note that the following dialogues are conducted in a serious and solemn scene:

English subtitles: “I’ve never played the bugle call.”
Malay subtitles: “Saya tidak pernah berbogel.” WTF HAHAHHAHAHAHHHAAHAHA WTF LA.

English subtitles: “I’ve been waiting for your bugle call.”
Malay subtitles: “Selama ini saya tengah menunggu bogel kamu.” SERIOUSLY WTF IS THIS HAHAHHAHAHA.

The local translating industry seriously needs a kick in the arse.

And then we went to Kim Gary as Ding wanted to “eat a late lunch”, but despite me initially wanting to go home early due to the aforementioned mental list that I wanted to stick to, the talks that followed that we had for 5 hours up to 10.30pm were something that couldn’t be replaced. It got me thinking – perhaps too much in fact – that my head was beginning to hurt, also possibly due to us sitting at the smoking area and I was inhaling second-hand smoke residues.

It was a heart-to-heart talk where we voiced out passionately about our thoughts and opinions and confessions and experiences and a multitude of things that cannot be summed up here.

I was also forced to re-evaluate my pouring out feelings and thoughts onto my blog (obviously only those bloggable things, if you catch my drift) as opposed to pouring them out in real life to a couple of close friends – such that I may have been too dependent on blogging. It’s going to sound like a cliché, but I’ve never been much of a talker even to the people close around me – since when have I been Clem the Talkative Guy? When was the last time that I actually made any of you laugh?

If there’s one defining flaw of mine that I’d like to correct, it is precisely this. It’s the easiest, most natural thing to do for most people, but I don’t even understand myself all too well to successfully initiate a corrective action.

You know, I used to write anything about my life into this blog – and that includes countless of rants and general emo-ness but if you noticed, I rarely write about such things anymore. Too many people read this personal space of mine that I have to maintain this image, this façade, this face, and it feels all too restrictive at times. This blog used to be that metaphorical key that opened the lock chaining my heart, but with all that I’ve just mentioned, I think I’ve lost that key and forgot how to unlock it again.

We were also talking about being double-faced, but come to think of it I’m more multi-faceted (not in a bad double-crossing way) than you think.

I’m happy we had the rather profound talk – hopefully we’d have more again?

This is the part where after typing all these walls of text, I’m supposed to feel much better. I should know – it’s engraved in that lock in me.